8 rules for dating your ex dating notes
When your friend breaks up with their boyfriend/girlfriend, it can be tricky to maneuver through the tension.
You have to be sensitive to how your friend is feeling and also not totally rude to their ex (unless their ex is a horrible person – in that case, give them the cold shoulder all you want! The last part is especially difficult if you’re friends with their ex, or just happen to see them in your social circle.
However, all too often you can get sucked into getting close to your friend’s ex (if you know what I mean), which is definitely not cool.
Nothing will alienate a friend quicker than them finding out you are spending quality time with their former bae.
Stay the same and she’ll see it was all just a fluke. You cannot change the core of your being in a single gesture. You’re not coming back this late in the game with a single desperate maneuver. Like the gulf between the man you are and the man you want to become. You have some work to do on yourself if you want to have healthy, lasting relationships with amazing women. Is it because she is the most special girl in the entire world, your one true soul mate?
Girls do not break up with fantastic boyfriends because of an argument or a few mis-chosen words. This is not a problem that gets solved with a text message. What is really driving you to want to get back with her?
If only they had chosen their words differently, they’d still be together with this girl. If you think you and your girlfriend broke up because of one conversation, this is going to hurt. She didn’t leave because of that ONE THING you did. It protects your ego, it coincides with rom-com plotlines, and it is total bullshit. Admit it when you’re living in a world of scarcity. It might mean completing the 21 day no complaint challenge or even quitting your job and starting a business you love. If you want love and you want to be worthy of love go do things . Become someone who you do love (that starts today, with a commitment to be your best self). Similarly, you cannot cherry pick one girl to make fall in love with you (even if it is your ex). Flowers, romantic gestures, promises things will be better . But it was already on life support and you’re just treating symptoms. Only when you’ve become a guy that is attractive to LOTS OF PEOPLE will you and your ex seriously stand a chance of getting back together.
It’s all just a defense mechanism: pretend the one girl you know liked you is a goddess instead of risking rejection by getting back out into the dating pool. “ This might mean dedicating yourself to the gym, signing up for a martial art, enrolling in an improv comedy class, playing a musical instrument at an open mic night. This is the hardest thing for a lot of guys to accept.: There IS NO WAY to just go get your ex back. these might extend the relationship by a few weeks.
It’s one thing to want a girl back because you have picked her above a whole host of others. This will help you in a number of ways: Practice awesomeness. Basically, everything it takes to become an improved human being and man. Learn to get awesome with people with How to Win Friends. Build courage, confidence, and a philosophy of abundance by working on your skills at attracting women outside of your social circle. The truth is, the fear that we don’t have control over our love lives is the greatest source of insecurity for most men. I’m not trying to insult your skills, but trust me — there is room for improvement. There are plenty of resources and the one that changed my life the most is called Sex God Method (it’s tough to find these days, otherwise I’d link out).
She’ll need you to come through for her over and over again throughout her life.
If you have a comment you would like for the author to see, please contact him via his blog, or email me directly at christine ATfromdatestodiapers DOTcom and I’ll be sure to pass it along to Michael.
Mothers – bookmark this list of rules and encourage your daughter’s daddy to read them, memorize them, and put them in to action.
And, to all you Dads out there – be sure you pay close attention and heed these wise words. Hang out together for no other reason than just to be in each other’s presence.